I know it to be true.
But unfortunately, despite knowing the pointlessness of worrying about stuff that will happen whatever, and that actually isn’t even bad, just necessary, my mind has been ignoring this truth and turning things over in a most unhelpful way.
I always used to feel dread at going back to school after the big holidays. I seem to be revisiting those days at the moment.
That back to school feeling is looming large.
But instead of making practical plans as to how I’m going to get stuff done and getting on with life, I am waking in the middle of the night or early morning to chew things over pointlessly, a feeling of dread gnawing at my insides.
If anyone has any tips for dealing with insomnia, I would be grateful if you would share them.
Because feeling sleep-deprived really does nothing at all for my confidence in my ability to achieve what I want to achieve.
Although actually, at the moment I’m not even sure just what that is any more.
I seem to be full of fear of the unknown. And full of doubt at my ability to find my way through it to the future.
I have started to feel guilty about not blogging my way through Christmas. Despite the fun of just living and enjoying real life, undocumented.
As a result of getting out of the blogging habit (writing just doesn’t happen without a measure of solitude, I find) I have become unsure where to go next with my blogging, my making, and even life generally.
Should we move house? Should I look for a job? Should I write a business plan? What should I make now? What should my resolutions for the New Year be?
My inspiration seems to have somewhat deserted me along with my blogging habit…
Others seem to be full of inspiration, motivation and resolution at this time of year. Alive with plans and fresh starts.
Whilst it’s good to take stock, to stop and look both backward and forward before marching onward into the future, it can also be paralysing.
So does anyone else feel like this at the fulcrum of the New Year?
Or is it just me? ♥